I was diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder four years ago this month. At that point, I could not function. My thoughts consumed me. Determined, I threw myself into working on myself. I am excited to report that I am in recovery! Much of what helped me was mindfulness. I think I rewired my brain. The poem below was my next assignment for my writing class…a conceit…and I chose to write about my OCD experience. I hope this helps someone else that has had to deal with the debilitating effects of OCD.
Wayward travelers, into the station fall!
Some stay, the station master enthralled,
though the conductor’s horn sounds.
These visitors follow the master and chat,
saying this and that,
and when the station closes, they will not go.
They will not move, though the master begs,
her emotions like powder kegs.
They feed on her anxiety.
Until she calmly sits
And, her lack of control, she freely admits
to her torments.
At last, bored with her, they depart
and she feels in her heart
that this station is once again hers.
This is based on a true story. Donny, 7-year-old son, brought me a firefly that could not fly, but it could walk, eat, etc. We spent the day researching fireflies and taking care of Fredrick. It died the next day sitting on a flower.
Fredrick the Firefly
One summer day, a young boy spied
a strolling little firefly.
However, upon closer inspection
the boy understood an imperfection.
For when the insect tried to take flight
the young boy noticed the small bug’s plight.
First, one wing flexed
and then the other,
but together they would never flutter.
Sensitive to the firefly’s situation,
the young boy determined a consolation.
This organism, the young boy would adopt
and he would give it a name he liked a lot.
King Frederick would be the firefly’s designation
and life be provided worthy of this station.
He built Frederick a home and brought flowers to eat
for pollen and nectar are a firefly’s treats.
And Frederick proved a memorable soul
even though flight would not be his goal.
At a school training, we watched a short video on the difference between empathy and sympathy by Brené Brown. In my writing course, I was tasked with comparing an image to an abstraction. This was my result. Enjoy!
warm apple cider
on a cold, crisp night.
at 2 in the morning.
when a cafe is closing.
I am presently taking two writing courses. I will post my assignments here to chart my path.
A person who never made a mistake, never tried anything new. —Albert Einstein